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December 8, 1998
Calendrical Reform

In a sneak attack at dawn yesterday, a terrorist cell of Japanese Historical Revisionists scrambled the world's calendars, attempting to replace "Pearl Harbor Day" with "Peaceful Lotus Blossom Day" (which fell on October 27th this year.

Calendrical experts worked feverishly past midnight to undo the damage, and they have succeeded for the most part. However, do not be surprised to find a few confused merchants displaying Halloween wares on their shelves today!

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